Soothe The Child In Us

We all have buried within us this child that we were. Soothing him is vital for emotional well-being and for maintaining good self-esteem.

Almost all of us have experienced emotional wounds as children, and if they weren’t healed back then, then that inner child remains hurt. Now we can try to figure out what to do to appease him.

When a negative emotion comes over you, ask yourself why you are feeling this way and try to understand it. Find the best way to change these negative thoughts. Because this child who is hiding in you needs love and tolerance.

Exercises to soothe this inner child

Imagine falling back into childhood. How were you at the age of 8? Try to visualize what you looked like physically, and if you’re struggling, use a photo from the time to jog your memory and capture as much detail as possible.

Now, embark on an exercise in visualization and imagination. Imagine yourself small, alone in your room. What were you doing in that room when you were alone?

Visualize your childhood, your past and every detail that makes them up. What was there for furniture in your room? What color were the walls? What were you playing at?

The more details you have, the more beneficial the effects of this exercise will be. Now imagine yourself as you are today. Imagine stepping into that bedroom you slept in as a child and opening the door.

You see a child, his head bowed, uncertain. This child you see is you. Next to you this child is you, your past.

This exercise serves to heal all the wounds of the past, since now that you are an adult you are able, through your imagination, to speak and touch that child that you were.

Approach this hurt, scared child and ask him what’s wrong with him. At that precise moment you can finally understand him, kiss him, hug him, protect him, support him, love him, etc. Do it, treat this child like you would have liked us to do when you were little.

Give him affection, understanding. Hold him tight and tell him that from now on he is safe, that you are going to take care of him and that you accept him as he is, because he deserves it.

Play with him, make his spontaneity stand out. Continue to visualize. Imagine taking this child to places he loves. Where did you prefer to go when you were little? What thing have you dreamed of having but never been able to get it?

Now you are able to give him whatever he wants. Go out, play, have fun! And when this inner child feels happy and at ease, then he will return to his room.

You can leave him, he’s safe. Say goodbye to him, and that whenever he needs it you will come back to him, to give him love.

The beneficial effects of the imagination

If you went through the exercise and put your imagination to work, you realized that the most uncertain, cruel, and frightening parts of you came from that child from the past.

Try to take care of it, love it, accept it and you will see improvements on an emotional level and you will have better self-esteem.

Adults whose inner child is appeased do not repress their desires. For example, they may be walking in a park and suddenly want to swing! And they don’t care how people look.

However, adults whose inner child is injured refrain from doing these kinds of childish things.

They force themselves to give a correct, strict image of an adult, without realizing that every human needs to return to childhood from time to time. 

Adults who have children can make time and play with this “mini-them” at the same time as they play with their children. However, adults who do not have children are more reluctant to start playing.

They don’t play ball, don’t talk nonsense. As if in adulthood you had to be strict and correct, and everyone else was immature.

What is certain, that there is nothing more beneficial than letting this inner child flourish and become spontaneous.

Don’t repress it. Because even as adults we sometimes need to have a little fun …

Photograph courtesy of José Miguel and Dani_vr