Sometimes It Is Not Love That Ends, But Patience

Sometimes, it is not love that ends, but patience, which for some is holy, because it resists thick and thin and always ends up giving more than it should.

But how can we not offer everything to this person with whom we have forged an emotional and vital bond, or even built a life project?

Reality always ends up opening our eyes at one point or another. Our heart cannot erase what it feels overnight, however, when we lose patience, we already begin to remove from our eyes this veil that was blinding us.

Some say that patience is a virtue, but it is obvious that this dimension cannot apply to all areas, and it cannot be unlimited.

We cannot spend a whole life being patient if our rights are affected. Our needs as human beings require reciprocity, care, affection and recognition.

Love, on the other hand, requires commitment, will and patience… but up to a point.

In love, patience and passivity, these are two different things

As we told you earlier, patience is generally considered a virtue. It is the faculty that we have to wait before certain things finally end up bringing us satisfaction, because we think that in the long term, this waiting will improve things.

We also see patience as an ability: that of tolerating unfavorable situations over which we may or may not have control. However, when we talk about love, we must always keep control of our own reality.

There are those who justify themselves by using patience as a dimension to assume.

Things are bad, but what can I do about it? You have to be patient. “What can we do if he / she is like this? Since we cannot change him / her, it is better to be patient… ”

We must not confuse patience and passivity

This is the most important thing to remember. We can be patient, and  we can make patience our most beautiful virtue because it helps us to better analyze the situation, to know how to observe as well as to reflect.

However, this whole internal process should not prevent us from seeing reality in the face.

A patient person does not have to be passive. The passive person makes tolerance his way of life, thus allowing abuse to occur, sometimes even until his integrity is affected.

The benefits of being patient, but not passive

When an emotional relationship is established, patience is a pillar of everyday life that we must recognize.

Obviously, we cannot appreciate every aspect, every behavior or every habit of our companion / companion, but for all that, we should not fall into the other extreme either and act impulsively by throwing in the face of the other all his faults before leaving him.

We are patient, we respect and we tolerate because we love.  However, we also know that in all couples, there is a time for things to harmonize, for everything to be in order, and for us to understand each other’s needs.

Patience should be mutual and seen as an exercise to be practiced. I am patient with you because I respect you and love you, because I recognize you as a person, and I know that to love is not only to love coincidences, but also to respect differences.

However, to be established, patience requires a certain emotional clarity. You have to know where the limits are, and understand when you are affected as a person, as a member of an emotional relationship.

We must not be passive in the face of demands laden with egoism, in the face of behavior that favors one person to the detriment of another.

We must not close our eyes to the lacks felt, nor be impassive to the emotional pain caused by emptiness, contempt, or this subtle abuse exerted through envenomed remarks.

And that’s where patience must fall, and pull the veil so that the truth can finally come to light.

When patience ends… What happens next?

Disappointment gives way to patience, because we then become aware of our reality in its slightest nuances.

However, this does not mean that we must immediately and necessarily break with this person, especially if we still love them.

Rather, it’s time to talk, put words into this situation, and let the other person know how you feel and what you need.

This is not to avoid the problem. If this commitment is important to us, then we will give everything we can to make it resistant.

For a relationship to last or for those shortcomings that make us suffer disappear, the effort must be mutual.

If we give the most and the other just apologizes, then the patience wears off completely, making disappointment an unfathomable abyss.

Patience is not the ability to wait, but the ability to understand that we deserve better.