Savior Syndrome
Helping others is one of the behaviors that enjoys great social recognition. Usually, when we are selfless, we make the other person’s life better. This is why on the social level, it is one of the most rewarded ways of acting. However, is it always a good thing to help others? The existence of savior syndrome seems to call this idea into question.
Savior syndrome is a psychological condition that causes a person to constantly feel the need to help others. This way of being pushes the individual to act a little extreme and his actions can even become very harmful.
In this article, we will try to understand what this way of being consists of. You will be able to identify it in yourself and in other people. And you will also be able to avoid situations in which the help can become very harmful to others.
What is savior syndrome
According to the official definition, a person suffering from savior syndrome constantly feels the need to save others. These people often tend to seek out individuals who need help and assistance and even sacrifice their own needs, wants and aspirations.
The problem is, these characteristics can easily lead to the creation of toxic relationships. In general, people who suffer from this complex tend to have co-dependent relationships. In the majority of cases, this is one of the worst types of relationships that can exist.
In these relationships, one person constantly needs the other’s help to feel good. He thinks he cannot live without this person. The savior, on the other hand, feels stronger thanks to the dependence of his / her spouse. But after a while, he will eventually get bored and feel limited by the need for the other.
Thus, in a co-dependent couple formed by the savior syndrome, none of the members is really happy. The person addicted to love will have less and less self-esteem and self-confidence while the other will feel suffocated and put the blame on his / her partner.
It should be noted that this dynamic does not only occur in couple relationships. It is possible to see it appear between friends, family members, work colleagues … However, it usually takes place in the area of romantic relationships.
How to avoid this dynamic
You will now find a series of keys that will help you avoid forming co-dependent relationships. If you think that to some extent you are suffering from this savior syndrome, applying them to your life can be of great help to you.
- Remember that you are only responsible for yourself. Each person must take the reins of their own life, their emotions and their actions. You don’t have to save people if it doesn’t make you happy.
- Learn to say no. For many people, refusing to do what a loved one asks them to do is extremely difficult. However, failure to do so inevitably leads to addiction and resentment. Dominating techniques like assertiveness can therefore go a long way in helping you improve your relationships.
- Set limits. If you have any characteristics related to the Savior Complex, it surely means that you enjoy helping others. So you need to know how far you can go. Is there something you don’t particularly like? At what point does helping others become too much for you?
- Your happiness is your priority. We have always grown up with the idea that taking care of your own well-being before that of others is a little selfish. However, if an action is going to make you unhappy, carrying it out makes no sense. If you really want to help, try to find a way to do it without suffering.
Ultimately, if you want to break free from Savior Syndrome, you have to examine yourself in a completely honest way. It is only by doing this and remembering that you are responsible for your happiness that you will be able to create and maintain relationships that bring you well-being.
Our thoughts We focus here on the famous work of Aristotle “Ethics to Nicomachus” to distinguish egoism from self-love.
