Getting Angry In A Smart Way
Anger is a normal and habitual feeling, but often we don’t know how to deal with it. We find ourselves in a situation of fury, then, all of a sudden, we wonder what to do.
When we are in this state of mind we can act right or wrong because anger is a difficult emotion to control.
Some people know how to keep it under control, while others can get totally carried away by it.
In this article, we’re going to tell you all about how to control your anger.
Recognize the type of your anger
First, you need to ask yourself what to do with anger, and what to do with it.
To begin with, you need to identify the way in which you get angry. There are 4 main types of personalities :
1. The passive type
Many people keep anger in them, without being aware of all the feelings they are repressing, and this can generate great anxiety. The upside is that these personalities don’t get angry easily.
They can therefore think before acting aggressively. This type of anger is found mostly in people who suffer from depression.
2. The passive-aggressive type
It’s the “time bomb ” type . People who adopt this attitude in the face of anger first suppress their feelings, but sooner or later they will explode.
This type of anger can also be expressed indirectly, through very subtle sarcasm for example.
3. The explosive type
The explosive person jumps at any opportunity to get angry, never suppressing his feelings.
Her tolerance level is very low and, faced with the slightest frustration, she will explode and get angry. These people have a habit of banging their fists on the table, hitting against a wall, or throwing hurtful words.
4. The winning type
A person who engages in this type of behavior knows how to express his anger verbally.
She does this after realizing what happened, and after finding out the reasons for her annoyance, and then expressing it in the right way to the person she has grievances against, without ever being aggressive.
Choose the right strategy
Once you have determined your type of anger, you need to think about how to calm yourself down when you get upset.
Remember that when a person is angry, they act without thinking. It is therefore necessary to initiate a reflection upstream of the situation which may cause you to unpin yourself.
1. Challenge your anger
Why did I get angry? Did I have valid reasons? What must I do now ? These are all questions you should definitely ask yourself after getting angry.
If you think about it carefully, you might find that you didn’t have any real motives for getting into this state, or at least that your reasons did not deserve such fury.
There are many times when we can overcome something that gets on our nerves. If you are unable to do so using this method, follow the next step.
2. Let your anger out
Do not repress it! It is never good to suppress your feelings, and you will have to externalize them at one point or another.
Talk to someone, shout, go out for a run, find a way to get all the things that are annoying you to come out of your mind.
Find the way that works best for you to achieve this result, because we all have different ways of reacting. What’s the right way for you to let go of your anger?
3. Put words to your anger
If you talk to someone about what made you angry, you will be able to calm yourself down. Above all, don’t keep this frustration to yourself.
As you step back from the situation, you may find that you were wrong. The person you are going to talk to can help you put things in perspective.
4. Avoid finding yourself in such situations
When we are upset, the worst thing we can hear is: “Calm down!”.
If you cross paths with an angry person, stride away! Anger is a very contagious feeling, and if you try to calm someone down, you may too get angry.
So don’t fall for this bad thing, and look for another time to chat with the angry person, once they have calmed down.
5. Watch your body language
Even though our anger episode seems to have passed in our mind, our body can still express it. We also communicate through our body, and it is often much slower to disconnect from certain feelings.
Even if we are no longer nervous, our face or our posture may express the opposite. Take a walk or run, or do something that lets you focus on something else, so the anger leaves your mind and body completely.
Let’s recap a little about the ways to fight anger. First, identify the way in which you get angry. Secondly, choose the strategy that best suits your personality.
Talking with someone is the most effective way to let go of feeling angry, but you need to calm down first to do this.
During anger, you are just a ball of tension, and you can unintentionally hurt the people you love.
